Half Drunk Muse Poetry


Would You Have Any Problem Selling Dildos to Men? by Ace Boggess

[posed in 1994 by Priscilla Pope, co-owner of Budget Tapes & Records (Charleston, WV) as the first question during a job interview]

The Marine on day leave, hair & eyes tight
with formality, hands trembling as if a shot rang out,
stepped into the sex room, winced to witness
oils that made incense out of flesh, raspberry-
flavored edible undies, illustrated books,
the vibrating tongue, the inflatable Fuck-Ewe,
padded whips & porn films—shelves &
spinning racks lined with so many physical tools
for the psyche’s work. Faster than a charge through
artillery bursts & rifle rounds, he snapped up
a simple flesh-tone—“shaped like the real thing.”
At the checkout counter, he missed my gaze
like a blind marksman, said, muffled, through barely-
open lips, “for my wife when I’m not here,”
his packaged prosthetic proof to her he loved her,
cared about her human needs. But I, with my coolly-
devilish young man’s grin & earlier offer—
“help you find what you’re looking for?”—
demoralized him more than twenty bodies, bloody,
bayonetted at his feet: that I might think him kinky,
gay, might mock him. He stood there erect &
engorged with flush while I took his money,
then he turned away without his change,
exited mumbling: “something, something, love . . .”

View bio for Ace Boggess Published in Fall 2004

About HDM

Half Drunk Muse was one of the first poetry ezines. It was founded in 1999 and ceased publication in 2006.

Questions/comments? Email samiller@halfdrunkmuse.com.